Take These Steps If You Are Going Through A Divorce

Divorce. That one word is loaded with immense emotions and power. Divorce equates to ending one part of your life, but it is not the end of your life. If you are experiencing a divorce and everything that comes with it, continue reading for steps to take to get through it and come out on the other side.

Find legal counsel.

Divorces are complicated. When children are involved, the process is rarely easy and requires professional help. This is where a divorce attorney comes in. They are trained in this area and are experts in the field. 

A divorce lawyer will be there every step of the way to guide you on what to do first and everything else that follows to ensure everyone is protected under the law. Your lawyer will draft custody agreements, help separate finances, and determine asset division. These are difficult tasks tied to emotions. As such, they are best left to the professionals to help sort it all out for the benefit of everyone involved.

Allow yourself to grieve.

The actions and processes surrounding grief are not relegated solely to death. Losing a marriage to divorce is a loss in and of itself. The years of shared experiences and memories matter.

Watch this video on the five stages of grief as translated through the lens of divorce.

Consider the memories.

Just because you are getting a divorce does not mean the past with your spouse did not happen. Your partner was a significant part of your life. Whether it was for decades, years, or a few short months, that timeline is part of your history now and forever.

If your divorce is acrimonious, you do not need to toss the photos into a bonfire. Take a moment and a breath before doing anything you will regret. Assuming that certain objects elicit strong feelings of sadness, anger, or remorse, it is perfectly acceptable to put them away and deal with them later. 

Attend to the paperwork.

Divorces require a lot of paperwork. This is particularly true if you have been married for a long time. Your lives and finances become almost inextricably intertwined over the years. And yet, things must become separate during and after a divorce.

Here is a list of items you need to update during a divorce:

• Life Insurance
• Power of Attorney
• Living Will
• Trust
• Healthcare Directive
• Health Insurance
• House Deed
• Car Title
• House and Car Insurance
• Bank Accounts
• Investment Accounts
• Credit Cards

The best way to address this is strategically. Go through every account and change names and passwords as appropriate based on who is awarded what in the divorce. Your lawyer will likely have advice in this area, as well.

Going through a divorce is not fun for anyone, even if it is the right move for you. It is a fraught experience that is a new part of your history and who you are. Get legal guidance to ensure your rights are protected. Seek emotional support, and take good care of yourself. You deserve to move forward with your life.